We have a total solar eclipse happening in my neck of the woods in November, which you can well imagine is completely over-hyped and there are people from all over coming here for the event. We have wackjobs coming out of the woodwork at present. Everything from the eclipse chasing festival goers, The trippy-hippies, to cult and occult leaders, to astronomers and shamans and witch doctors. Theres Christian doom and gloomers and psychic channelers. They are all getting in early for the best show on Earth.

Apparently it’s the herald of the end of the world. The planet is going to turn upside down or something because the ancient mayan tribes decided it was a good time to wind up there 13000 year long count calendar. Nibiru is coming, and we are going to be visited by the galactic federation of light…. Apparently. Not to mention JC and the rapture as well. We have a very busy year in store. I wouldn’t be at all surprised if Cthulhu picks this as his moment, as well as some kind of zombie apocalypse.

I am not going to detract from the awesome signifigance of this mayan date, or the pure exhileration of witnessing an astrological event like a total solar eclipse. It’s true, both of these things are amazing, and the odds of being alive at the right time on this planet for both of these things are well… astronomical. However! Come on people. Can we turn down the doomsday hype just a touch?

If we want to look at this situation rationally I think we can all agree that the world is probably NOT going to end this year. Just the same way it didn’t end on the 150 other doomsdays we have survived in the past millenia.

I think that what it probably does signify, and I see this everywhere I look, is a subtle change of the worlds overall values. I truly hope this is the case. Maybe a shift away from the ‘profit at any cost’ mindset into something that is a little more humanitarian and sustainable. In truth, we cannot continue on our present course and I think people know that.

Maybe that’s why the morbid doomsday scenarios even exist, because it’s easier than actually having to step up and take responsibility for our shit. We hope that an errant planet is going to collide with ours, because then we don’t have to deal with the mess we’ve collectively made. It’s kind of like hoping the house burns down so you don’t have to do the dishes.

Humans are strange.

I’m preparing myself for another foray into the undying light. My label has arranged another party at a resort in the rainforest north of my home. I’m playing the midnight slot on the first night, and due to my broken gear situation I’m forced to put together a DJ set, when what I really want to do is play originals, but it’s not the right time slot, and I have nothing new to show.

Writing tunes is my only outlet. It’s how I release and not having my tools available to me for the past few months has left me frustrated. I have been delving into some far out stuff to try and get the same feeling, but nothing quite cuts it. I’m blogging (ffs) I guess partly to alleviate my own inner tension. It’s working. I’m usually quite a fun-loving guy, but here I want to be serious. I want the catharsis of just blurting my inner bullshit out into the world, and I care not who reads it so long as they don’t intellectualise it too much and think that somehow these words equal the sum of me. 

I have been a fucking midnight demon in my scene for the past 10 years, and I’m jaded. I have watched it turn from an innocent escape with good drugs and great people, into a shallow slimy ego-fest with plastic women and meth-heads protein-shaking in front of speakers, starting fights and talking about inane bullshit. I find myself in conversation with these sweaty quasi-humans, and I wonder if they are even speaking the same language, it sounds like so much garble, and is usually capped off with ‘so do you know where I can get any ice, man?’ My answer is always the same. “Fuck off Idiot”.

So much for the beautiful tropics. I used to think we were somehow immune from the rest of the world, like a beautiful oasis surrounded by a sea of turds,  but now I realise that we were just 5 years behind the times. The southern cross branded, flatcapped, fuckwit speed creatures have moved in and they’re here to stay. I am captive in my environment, I’ve been doing it so long that it’s just expected. I am obliged to entertain these clones.

You know what? it’s not these people. I don’t do it for them. It’s the amazing, talented colourful individuals that temper the mix. They keep me inspired, and I do love it. I just need to vent this shit because it’s brewing up in me and like I said, I am in need of my release. It’s funny how it translates. When I release through music it’s in a loving almost comedic way and I visualise colours and shapes and geometric tesselations. Doing it this way through text is like bile excreta. I can feel it rising like a kind of black sludge. I detest it, but I think it’s necessary.

One of my good friends has just gone through a messy divorce from a narcissistic cunt of a woman. Before they seperated he had gone to such a dark place that he tried to kill himself several times. He’s better now, but in the many conversations we had when he was trying to mend his shattered psyche, we came to realise that in the 10 years he was married, he never had any release. He used to escape through computer games, but escaping is not releasing. So we talked about how important it is to purge your shit through something creative, art or otherwise, and he took it on board and do you know what the funny bastard came up with? Spoken Word Poetry! and he’s good at it. I mean really good. He delivers these macabre monologues in this deep, resonant voice and it’s really good to listen to and really quite funny. If I can I will upload some of his stuff. But he’s lucky because he found his outlet before it killed him.

Suicide is everywhere. I have lost 3 people recently who, while were not in my close circle of friends, were close enough to me to rattle me. It’s a shame that people do not know how to reach out when they lose hope. I blame the world we live in, with all it’s false shallowness and unreal expectations. How can a young person thrive in this bleak landscape without becoming another mindless clone, wrapped up in the too thin blanket of the worlds current opiate, consumption. There is no solace to be had in the supermarket. The current trend of doping kids out on whatever pharmaceutical grade zombie tablets are in fashion instead of helping them deal with their problems. “You’re depressed, here eat this and you won’t feel bad anymore… in fact you won’t feel anything… Side effects may include mania and suicidal tendencies” wtf.

hmm I think that might be enough for today.. I feel better in a way just knowing this tripe is free to the world. Free for you, beautiful stranger, whoever you are, to delve into my deepest, most inner feelings. So dig in.